Welcome back everyone!
Hope you’re all going well!
Today we are going to be discussing Epiphany, the true “Intro” song of the third Love Yourself album (per my theory) anddd… the most special song of the Love Yourself albums.
What makes Epiphany so special? Well, before we start analysing the lyrics, we are going to talk about the making and the order of Epiphany first.
Compared to the other songs in the Love Yourself albums, the decisions that were specifically made for Epiphany were unique and thoughtful.
The unique decisions indicate to us that not only is Epiphany the most important song in the Love Yourself albums, but this song was also designed specifically for Jin and for Jin only. No other member except Jin was “qualified” enough to write or sing this song.
What do I mean by all of this and why does it matter? Well, without further ado, let’s find out!
Assumed Knowledge & Assumptions
I have written this post assuming you know:
- my theory, that all of the songs in LY albums are connected and reveal a storyline when read in a specific order; and
- Joon, Yoongi and Hobi’s stories discussed in my blog so far.
New Readers
Hello there and welcome to my blog! I’m sorry to say that if you haven’t read any of the above posts… I may lose you in the detail as my lyrical analyses are built on existing knowledge!
This is simply because all of the songs are interconnected and need to be read in a specific order for it to make sense, just like a book.
If you’re wondering where to start, please start here.
Please also note the assumptions I apply when I analyse songs.
Enjoy! 😊
1. The significance of Epiphany
1a. The making of Epiphany
Epiphany was not written by any of the BTS members.
Per this source and Namjoon’s Vlive, it was materially produced and written by PD Bang.
Namjoon said the following about Epiphany:
- At 33.17 – “This is the only song I was not involved in.”
- At 33.27 – “As Jin said, Jin is interested in composing. He worked hard to make a melody for this song. Jin fixed his melody a few days before we finalised this song. But our producer worked with a composer who he used to work with and came up with a new melody. So it was changed… It’s a song made by one person. Producer Bang wrote it from the beginning to the end.“
According to my theory, this is unexpected because we would expect Joon, Hobi and/or Yoongi to contribute to this song given their comprehensive storylines and involvement in the Love Yourself albums.
It is also unexpected that Jin was given the task to compose Epiphany given he does not write many songs. If he is interested in composing, why did he not help with the other songs? Why was he specifically asked to write Epiphany? And if BigHit didn’t like Jin’s melody and wanted to change it, why not ask Joon, Hobi or Yoongi to help given they pretty much wrote the rest of the Love Yourself albums? Why didn’t any of the other BTS members help Jin? Why did BTS decide to let PD Bang write it for Jin? Why not give Jin another song to sing and write?
These decisions indicate that BTS felt that the messages in this song could only be written and delivered by Jin. No other BTS member should or could get involved in the song.
Thus, when BigHit decided for whatever reason that the melody Jin came up with was not suitable, it was PD Bang that was tasked with creating a song that was specifically suitable for Jin’s voice.
Why is this important?
P-dogg said the following about BTS:
“The members themselves write about 90% of the lyrics… they believe that they should be the ones to tell their stories. They don’t tell stories that they don’t know or didn’t experience themselves.”
In the context of P-dogg’s interview and the stories we have discovered in my blog, it makes perfect sense why Joon, Hobi and Yoongi did not take part in this song though they are the main songwriters.
It is because Joon, Hobi and Yoongi as at the period of time just after (Outro) Tear have not yet accepted themselves.
They were just about to or had just started learning how to love themselves.
This is consistent with what Namjoon said at 35.09 of his Vlive – “But this is me. It’s hard to admit that… I need to admit [to] myself. Lyrics of “Epiphany” tell us to do so“
Jin, however, had his epiphany moment approximately 1-2 years ago before (Outro): Tear. Thus, when early 2018 came around, Jin had been well and truly ahead in his self-acceptance journey. His journey is particularly special given he faced the most criticisms when it came to his singing and dancing abilities which would have in some way or other (because he was young and is human) impacted his self-confidence and image.
Jin shared with us his epiphany moment on the second day of his and Joon’s Friendship Trip in Hawaii (Bon Voyage Season 2, Episode 2, 2017). The conversation went like this:
Namjoon: I don’t think you used to be this cheerful. When was the turning point?
Jin: After “Fire” [NB: Released in 2016]
Namjoon: “Fire?”
Jin: The basic dance move was blowing a kiss.
Namjoon: That was your turning point?
Jin: Yes. I blew a kiss, an I saw people’s enthusiastic reactions. They hated and loved it at the same time.
Namjoon: And you liked that.
Jin: Yes. So I came to make a lot of lame jokes.
[Their attention then gets diverted to watch the sunset, and they suggest to make a poem about the ocean/sea.]
Namjoon: 바: 바다다 (Ba: It’s the Sea)
다: 다시 오고 싶다 (Da: I want to come again)
Jin: That’s beautiful. I’m going to make a touching one.
Namjoon: Not like you?
Jin: Yeah.
바: 바보 같은 나를 (Ba: I’m so stupid)
다: 다 받아줘서 고마워 우리 멤버들 (Da: But you accept me, my dear members)
As you can see, the above dialogue indicates that during a “Fire” performance, Jin had his epiphany that though he may be silly and may not be the strongest singer and dancer, he is still worthy of love. At that moment ARMY reacted to Jin’s flying kiss, Jin realised that being his silly “stupid” self who throws cringey flying kisses to ARMY is completely okay, and that since there are ARMYs who accept and love him for the way he is, he should also love and accept himself for the way he is.
In addition, he realised that his members also love and accept him for the way he is. If his members and ARMY can love and accept him as Kim Seokjin (and to those who hate those flying kisses… well you can’t impress everyone right?)… then why can’t he love and accept himself too?
In short, Jin was the first member to have an epiphany about self-love and acceptance. This is why no one else in BTS except Jin was qualified to write or sing this song.
This is why:
- Namjoon said at 36.22 of his Vlive – “…Jin understood this song well. He challenged [himself] to compose a song and write lyrics… Jin is the only one who can do this.”; and
- JK said: “I think there is no one who could sing this kind of song better than Jin.”
1b. The order of Epiphany
My theory states that Epiphany is the true “Intro” track of Love Yourself, ‘Answer’ and not Euphoria even though it is not the first track.
It is the true “Intro” track of Love Yourself ‘Answer’ because it is the track after Outro: Tear, which is the Outro track of Love Yourself ‘Tear’.
This is consistent with what Joon said in this Vlive at 33.18 – “It is in the introduction part and a song by vocalists.”
My theory also states that:
- There are two songs that relate to the 起 prefix (起 meaning beginnings). They are Trivia 起: Just Dance and Euphoria (which is general enough so it can relate to all three perspectives);
- There are two songs that relate to all three perspectives that are related to the 承 prefix (承 meaning development): DNA and Her; and
- There are two songs that relate to all three perspectives that are related to the 轉 prefix (轉 meaning turn): Fake Love and Tear.
I have also previously pointed out that interestingly, none of the songs have a ‘結’ prefix which means answer. I’ve previously stated that I will explain it when the time comes, and… I will explain more when the time comes hahaha. The time hasn’t come yet.
But what is important is that the above points in my theory are consistent with what Joon said at 34.12 – “[Epiphany] wasn’t the first track of our album, but this track is special. I mean, it’s special not because it’s not the first, but its the only song that talks about “Kyeol” the conclusion. Two talk about the “Ki” beginning, two sing about “Seung”, development, and two describe “Jeon”, turn, in this album. But Jin is the only one who talks about “kyeol”, conclusion… From this album Love Yourself ‘Answer’, this is the only and precious song for the conclusion part.”
In short, Joon’s comments:
1) reinforces my point that there is the intentional structure in the Love Yourself albums and that order matters; and
2) are consistent with many points of my theory.
And, there is one key takeaway from this:
Epiphany is the only song that talks about the conclusion.
Epiphany contains the precious message – that The Answer to dealing with all of the issues previously discussed in my blog (e.g. Fake Love) and to be truly happy is that you must love yourself first.
This is why Epiphany is the most important song of the Love Yourself albums.
This also means that the rest of the songs in Part 3 of the trilogy (I’m Fine, Idol and Answer: Love Myself) are not about the “answer”.
I’m Fine, Idol and Answer: Love Myself are about what happens after finding out the “answer”.
And… This is why Epiphany does not have a ‘結’ prefix because… it is not really the end.
And… this is why there are calla lilies in Epiphany’s video because they stand for overcoming challenges and resurrection and rebirth. This is not the end because it is the start of a new beginning.
Whew. Long first part! Have a break, stretch it out. Once you’re ready to analyse the lyrics… Let’s go!
2. The Speaker
Since PD Bang wrote the lyrics of this song for Jin, there is nothing specific in the lyrics that can be attributed to a certain member.
Similarly to Euphoria, as we are going to be analysing this from a general perspective, I am going to be referring to the speaker as “the speaker” or “their”/”them” as the speaker could be anyone, male or female.
Thus, when the speaker is talking about someone other than themselves, they could be referring to any or all of the three “Hers”. But please remember, the speaker could be you too! This “other person” can be replaced with someone personal to your own story.
3. Unmasking
[Verse 1]
So weird, I for sure loved you so much
I adapted myself entirely to you, I wanted to live for you
But as I kept doing so, I became unable to bear the storm inside my heart
My real self under the smiling mask, I reveal it entirely
The general storylines told through Trivia 起: Just Dance, Euphoria, DNA, Her, Fake Love and Tear tell the story about the speaker meeting “Her”, the euphoric feeling of reciprocated love, and the journey of falling deeper in love with “Her”. However, as issues inevitably started to arise, the speaker only wanted to show their best selves to “Her” and willingly adapted themselves to become perfect dolls for “Her”. This decision led to their relationships becoming fake, resulting in the break up in “Tear”.
We can see that this narrative is continued in the first verse. The speaker says, “so weird, I for sure loved you so much, I adapted myself entirely to you.” The “you” in the first verse is referring to “Her”.
The speaker realises that due to their obsession and desire to be loved by “Her”… They changed everything about themselves just to suit “Her”. They were living for “Her” instead of themselves. And though they pretended to be fine, their true selves were not and it created “the storm inside my heart.”
With this realisation, the speaker frees their real self by entering the storm.
4. Confronting their real self
[Verse 2]
I’m shaking and afraid but I keep going forward
I’m meeting the real you, hidden in the storm
Why did I want to hide my precious self like this?
What was I so afraid of?
Why did I hide my true self?
[Bridge]
Perhaps I’m a bit dull and imperfect
Perhaps people might not see my shy sparkle
But I’m me just as I am
My arms, legs, heart, and soul that I have lived with until now
On the way to confronting their real self, the speaker is “shaking and afraid.”
This conveys to us that the process of confronting their real self was scary because of the fear and dread of what they will find.
The “you” in the lyrics “I’m meeting the real you, hidden in the storm” in this case is referring to their real self.
When the speaker finds their true self hidden in the storm, they inspect it and observed that though they are “a bit dull and imperfect… people might not see my shy sparkle” , they realised with a surprise that their real self is “precious.”
We can also observe that the outcome of the meeting (“Why did I want to hide… what was I so afraid of? Perhaps… a bit dull…” ) is anti-climactic as they realised that all of the fear they had was for nothing as there was nothing scary about their real self.
The anti-climax of the lyrics give us comfort and gentle encouragement for us to bravely face our true selves.
Our true selves are most likely not as scary and frightening as we think they are!
6. I’m the one I should love
[Chorus]
I’m the one I should love in this world
Shining me, the precious soul of mine
I finally realised, so I love me
Though I’m not perfect, I’m so beautiful
I’m the one I should love
The speaker comes to a realisation that though their sparkle is a little “shy” , their little sparkle is what makes them shine and unique, “shining me, the precious soul of mine.” Beauty, as the speaker realises, does not equal perfection, and perfection does not equal beauty.
In the last chorus, the lyrics “I’m the one I should love in this world” are changed to:
I want to love in this world
Shining me, the precious soul of mine
I finally realised, so I love me
Though I’m not perfect, I’m so beautiful
The change of lyrics from “I’m the one I should love in this world” to “I want to love in this world” convey to us the message that if you want to be able to love someone and be loved in this world, you need to love yourself first.
Lastly, the lyrics “I’m the one I should love” is repeated no less than 7 times in Epiphany. The repetition of “I’m the one I should love” emphasises the importance of this message and has the effect of behaving like the speaker’s (and our) personal mantra throughout the song.
Say it with me: “I’m the one I should love… I’m the one I should love… I’m the one I should love…” 💜
Author’s Thoughts
When I first unexpectedly fell down the rabbit hole, I had a long period of self-reflection. What makes BTS so special? What gives BTS the X-Factor? What makes ARMY so committed to BTS? Why on earth have I become so obsessed with them?
Sure they are all incredibly talented singers, composers and dancers, but objectively, so are many other groups and artists.
After thinking deeply about this, I came to this conclusion – we (ARMY) have fallen in love with BTS as people. Their music, dancing, singing, looks, etc are all secondary.
We love them so much as human beings that all we want is for them to be happy and successful; and because of this desire, we suddenly find ourselves motivated to do things like streaming their music on loop to help them get Billboard #1, inhaling all BTS content and becoming defensive if someone says something negative BTS.
If we dig a little further and think about why we love BTS so much as people, I believe it is fair to say it is because we all felt their authenticity as fellow human beings. They felt real to us, they felt true to us and we connected with them deeply.
And then if we dig even further down to think about why and how BTS became to feel so authentic to us… It seems that a lot of it had to do with Jin. Jin was the one who realised that being “lame” is completely okay and unleashed an era of horrible (I say amazing) dad jokes that sent everyone slowly dying on the inside.
I believe that this had a trickle-down effect on the rest of the younger members when they realised they didn’t need to act cool or be gangster to be cool. Wearing a ridiculous amount of pink suddenly became cool, being given easier dance choreography and being the “wings” of BTS became respectable and cool, epically failing at dyeing your hair was something hilariously funny, wearing the most ridiculous outfit to annoy and embarrass your dongsaengs was awesome, etc etc.
Jin’s “lameness” gave the younger members the confidence to laugh when they slipped on stage, the self-confidence to look ridiculous (because it is not possible to wear a more ridiculous outfit than Kim Seokjin), and the courage to self-dye your hair half magenta and half blonde just for shits and giggles. He also created a homely family atmosphere through the warmth of home-cooked meals and nurtured their playful spirit by showing how to love the f*** out of your dongsaengs by annoying the f*** out of them. It is these little things that made so many of us fall in love with BTS.
And if you think about, all evidence points to Jin being the one who inspired the Love Yourself agenda – not just the message about the importance of self-love and acceptance, but also the biggest storyline told Serendipity, Dimple, The Truth Untold, etc of Joon’s journey to self-love.
Perhaps most amazing thing if you think about it, is that Jin is the member that added The “X-factor” into BTS. Without Jin’s influence from the top, BTS will probably just be like any other group, incredibly talented with respect to singing and dancing, but missing that intimate human touch and wholesomeness.
Jin made BTS imperfect, and this imperfection is what we love about BTS the most. The imperfection that Jin brings can be compared to his over the top flying kisses, or when he wears the back of the tie longer than the front, or when he asks random people “DO YOU KNOW BTS?” We cringe, we moan “oh will you please stop it?!“, oh god we hate it because that is just so not cool… but my my goodness do we love it.
In short, the strength of the emotional connection between ARMY and the boys I believe can be traced down to Kim Seokjin’s quiet but profound influence. No one should be sleeping on Kim Seokjin.
As always, thank you for reading and please remember to share, retweet and subscribe! Borahae!
💜 G
Lyric sources: Doolset Lyrics and Genius lyrics – Please note I made some minor updates where I thought things could be expressed better. These minor updates do not result in any substantial change in meaning.
Disclaimer:
As per my first author’s note, please, no hate!
I do not have a shipping or individual bias, I love all seven members equally and I do not write my blogs because of a particular personal desire for one of them. I reached my conclusion on Joon and Jin being together based on the lyrics, logic and patterns as I have discussed in all my posts (i.e. I did not ship Namjin first, and then started trying to find things to prove my point). I genuinely enjoy all ships because I enjoy watching the different chemistries between the boys.
It does not matter one bit to me if they are straight, gay, intersex, a skrull, a mutant or if they could lay eggs. I love them wholeheartedly (as a sister who would love her younger brothers) for their individual selves.
This theory of Epiphany is based on my interpretations of its lyrics. Please enjoy.